[Rosen does not answer Lance's comment about hatred. Hatred, notably self-hatred, is an emotion that Rosen has used in times to get himself off the mat. To push himself to protect more. Fight more. But he recognizes what Lance is saying as truth. And perhaps it was self-serving, trying to give Lance an out to cut him off now before it would hurt even more later. And even now Lee feels the uncomfortable bristling that comes from being viewed under the harsh light of reality, pathetic and vulnerable, and left wondering if he's just poured a corrosive acid into the veins of their friendship. Because even if Lance might not say as much, might be too kind to say as much, how could he trust Rosen the way he had before knowing what he now knows.
But Lee resolves here and now that, if Lance has not decided to cut him out like some cancerous mass, then he will show through action how important the young man's friendship has become to him. Its the harder route. One that takes time. Patience. But its more than worth the effort.]
I wish I had done things right when it was the time to act, but yes.
[He taps a fingertip against the side of the mug]
All the things I failed to do right by my daughter, by my family, are things I strive to get right now. For my Alphas. To protect them. And if I can find a way, to protect all of them. Not just my team. And also to help them grow.
[A laugh forces its way from his throat and his eyes shine]
I-I'm so proud of them. I wish you could meet them. These amazing people. I wish I could show you how far they've come. Nina and Rachel...and Gary....
[Which reminds him...]
...They don't have me to help them now. Not as long as I am in that cell.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2017-05-23 12:44 am (UTC)But Lee resolves here and now that, if Lance has not decided to cut him out like some cancerous mass, then he will show through action how important the young man's friendship has become to him. Its the harder route. One that takes time. Patience. But its more than worth the effort.]
I wish I had done things right when it was the time to act, but yes.
[He taps a fingertip against the side of the mug]
All the things I failed to do right by my daughter, by my family, are things I strive to get right now. For my Alphas. To protect them. And if I can find a way, to protect all of them. Not just my team. And also to help them grow.
[A laugh forces its way from his throat and his eyes shine]
I-I'm so proud of them. I wish you could meet them. These amazing people. I wish I could show you how far they've come. Nina and Rachel...and Gary....
[Which reminds him...]
...They don't have me to help them now. Not as long as I am in that cell.