[Lance had hoped Ellie might feel like she could open up a little, but he hadn't really expected her to and so it's a surprise--a good surprise--when she starts talking. He's quiet as she does so, watching her enough to show that he's paying attention, but still trying not to make her feel scrutinized and allowing his gaze to drop when he nods at some of her words.
There are multiple facets to what she's said, multiple ways to interpret her words and multiple issues that seem to be underlying them. He doesn't know her well enough yet to be completely sure of which to approach first, or exactly how to do so, but intuition gives him a place to start and he does his best from there.]
I think that sometimes there's a misunderstanding of what optimism looks like, because it's seen through the lens of an 'average' person. For them, optimism might mean believing the best will happen, or that they'll get something they desire or things will fall into place just as they want them to.
But for a person who's had to fight every day just to survive, something that others might see as a given--choosing to trust someone, hoping that they get through a day without being hurt, even just convincing themselves there's something worth getting out of bed for--is just as optimistic as believing the best will happen.
[He isn't arguing with her assessment about there being a breaking point, at least not exactly. But there's a subtle value in reframing things, in not looking at them in terms of a 'normal' person versus a 'broken' one, with 'normal' being the default. Both are just people, and neither are so firmly set into their categories as many are often led to believe.
Although he's been watching the river as he spoke, he turns his attention back to Ellie again, no longer talking in vague terms but in direct ones.]
Who you you were in the Aerie isn't better than who you are now. Maybe there are things about that version of you that you liked more, and that's okay, but there's nothing wrong with who you are here. Especially not when you consider what you've had to face just to make it this far.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2021-02-21 01:42 am (UTC)There are multiple facets to what she's said, multiple ways to interpret her words and multiple issues that seem to be underlying them. He doesn't know her well enough yet to be completely sure of which to approach first, or exactly how to do so, but intuition gives him a place to start and he does his best from there.]
I think that sometimes there's a misunderstanding of what optimism looks like, because it's seen through the lens of an 'average' person. For them, optimism might mean believing the best will happen, or that they'll get something they desire or things will fall into place just as they want them to.
But for a person who's had to fight every day just to survive, something that others might see as a given--choosing to trust someone, hoping that they get through a day without being hurt, even just convincing themselves there's something worth getting out of bed for--is just as optimistic as believing the best will happen.
[He isn't arguing with her assessment about there being a breaking point, at least not exactly. But there's a subtle value in reframing things, in not looking at them in terms of a 'normal' person versus a 'broken' one, with 'normal' being the default. Both are just people, and neither are so firmly set into their categories as many are often led to believe.
Although he's been watching the river as he spoke, he turns his attention back to Ellie again, no longer talking in vague terms but in direct ones.]
Who you you were in the Aerie isn't better than who you are now. Maybe there are things about that version of you that you liked more, and that's okay, but there's nothing wrong with who you are here. Especially not when you consider what you've had to face just to make it this far.