[Although distantly annoyed by the parts of this that feel like a lecture, his natural reaction to be defensive is dampened by his mood and everything that's happened recently. So he's more easily able to look past it and try to focus on the actual points being made, rather than how they're being made, and not necessarily feel the need to fight what he feels are unfair assessments of expectations. It's not going to get him anywhere anyway, and he can recognize easily enough that Stephen's not actually trying to be combative, so there's no need to fight when it's not necessary. Especially not after what they've all been through.
Besides, as much as he'd theoretically like to argue some points, he can't. He realizes suddenly that, although he's extremely familiar with how conversations online tend to go, he's familiar with it at home; the way he views the network here, in contrast, he's been considering more like Hadriel's where discussion did often go somewhere even with how volatile the population was. But that was in Hadriel, not here, and he can't be expecting even something that simple to carry over, which is exhausting but just the reality of the situation. So Stephen's right, he has to change how he's thinking about it, and try to let it get to him a little less.
Of course, it's still easier said than done to try to figure out how he can talk to and worth with on problems if using the network is basically out, but fine. If that's the situation, it's the situation. He can deal with that.
And as for that part about what Gaby said, he doesn't really feel as strongly about it as he might've normally, but there's still a distinct sense of both anger and relief; more the latter than the former, though both are still there. It's incredibly good to know that it isn't a real threat he has hanging over him that he has to worry about, but it's also deeply upsetting that she would pull such a tactic knowing he wouldn't be willing to call the possible bluff.
But that's not something he's willing to get into even with himself right now, let alone with Stephen. So he tries to focus just on the point of what Stephen's saying overall, and how best to respond to it, even though that ends up being only simply--]
Okay. I'll look into how to better approach this going forward.
[That's about as much as he can promise right now.]
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2021-01-22 08:08 pm (UTC)Besides, as much as he'd theoretically like to argue some points, he can't. He realizes suddenly that, although he's extremely familiar with how conversations online tend to go, he's familiar with it at home; the way he views the network here, in contrast, he's been considering more like Hadriel's where discussion did often go somewhere even with how volatile the population was. But that was in Hadriel, not here, and he can't be expecting even something that simple to carry over, which is exhausting but just the reality of the situation. So Stephen's right, he has to change how he's thinking about it, and try to let it get to him a little less.
Of course, it's still easier said than done to try to figure out how he can talk to and worth with on problems if using the network is basically out, but fine. If that's the situation, it's the situation. He can deal with that.
And as for that part about what Gaby said, he doesn't really feel as strongly about it as he might've normally, but there's still a distinct sense of both anger and relief; more the latter than the former, though both are still there. It's incredibly good to know that it isn't a real threat he has hanging over him that he has to worry about, but it's also deeply upsetting that she would pull such a tactic knowing he wouldn't be willing to call the possible bluff.
But that's not something he's willing to get into even with himself right now, let alone with Stephen. So he tries to focus just on the point of what Stephen's saying overall, and how best to respond to it, even though that ends up being only simply--]
Okay. I'll look into how to better approach this going forward.
[That's about as much as he can promise right now.]