The problem isn't that anyone disagrees with the core point you're making. Nobody's happy that our new arrivals may be left more traumatized by the steps we take to keep them safe. But without a viable, blended alternative to the current process in the mix and given how heated the discussion has become, it's easy to assume when you criticize our current system that you're arguing we ought to drop it and mitigate the risk you want highlighted instead of the risk we're already mitigating. It reads as one versus the other, not one plus the other, and what you're actually saying gets lost in the conflict that creates.
The other problem you're up against is that the network is where discourse goes to die a sudden, violent, and unprovoked death. It's useful logistically in times of crisis and it's beneficial for keeping us all connected to one another and El in an encrypted setting, but it has historically never been the place for meaningful public debate that doesn't run the risk of devolving into squabbling and miscommunication. There are too many of us with too many breadths of experience in this world, let alone in our own, for it to ever be a guaranteed place for civil discussion on important issues. It's the comments section on a local newspaper's unmoderated social media page, not a free and fair forum for discussion or an accurate representation of any one person or our collective point of view. You need to learn that now before you take it too much to heart. People have never been good at communicating online.
So you're right. The network is unforgiving, and it's hard to know where else to start when it seems to be everyone's go-to and is our most easily accessible source of shared information. What I would advise is speaking privately and in person with a group of people you can trust to share ideas with and work together to create a first draft of an alternative plan. Talk to the new arrivals, but do it in the safehouse or in private messages with those who've already engaged you, or wait until they have their IDs and invite them to a group. Then, when you have something that looks like a solid foundation, share that with the network. You'll be in a position to develop and adapt something new rather than criticize and poke holes in something old and that'll let you use the network as a feedback gathering tool rather than a space for discussion. There will be discussions regardless no doubt, and you may still get your share of hostility, but that's the nature of it. You won't have to argue because nothing's decided yet, and you can pick up on the people who are approaching you openly with suggestions for improvements and involve them in the next stage of the process. And so on.
You'll need to be open to ultimately creating something that blends everyone's concerns. It'll take time. As you're very well aware, there are many of us who have different priorities to you, and you're going to have to finds ways to work in tandem with rather than in opposition to them. Given that we all have the same ultimate desire, getting this done is far from impossible. But it'll be a big job, so if you decide to take it on you'll need people around you who you can trust both to look out for you and to hold you to account. Not because you're the only one prone to confrontation on the topic, but because at that stage your actions will reflect on the project in ways others' will not.
And to the last point, Gaby's threat has no power behind it. I've spoken with El, there's no intention there to cut us off. Gaby's been through the same thing we all have, and she's not equipped to handle this kind of drama now. That's all. You don't have to censor yourself for fear of repercussions on that end, but I do think it's as good a moment as any to change your approach and make an actual difference.
I'm happy to help where appropriate. But it's going to need somebody driving it to get it off the ground, and people who have the ability to invest actively in it to keep it growing, and it's up to you to decide whether you're ready to take that on.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2021-01-22 04:21 pm (UTC)The other problem you're up against is that the network is where discourse goes to die a sudden, violent, and unprovoked death. It's useful logistically in times of crisis and it's beneficial for keeping us all connected to one another and El in an encrypted setting, but it has historically never been the place for meaningful public debate that doesn't run the risk of devolving into squabbling and miscommunication. There are too many of us with too many breadths of experience in this world, let alone in our own, for it to ever be a guaranteed place for civil discussion on important issues. It's the comments section on a local newspaper's unmoderated social media page, not a free and fair forum for discussion or an accurate representation of any one person or our collective point of view. You need to learn that now before you take it too much to heart. People have never been good at communicating online.
So you're right. The network is unforgiving, and it's hard to know where else to start when it seems to be everyone's go-to and is our most easily accessible source of shared information. What I would advise is speaking privately and in person with a group of people you can trust to share ideas with and work together to create a first draft of an alternative plan. Talk to the new arrivals, but do it in the safehouse or in private messages with those who've already engaged you, or wait until they have their IDs and invite them to a group. Then, when you have something that looks like a solid foundation, share that with the network. You'll be in a position to develop and adapt something new rather than criticize and poke holes in something old and that'll let you use the network as a feedback gathering tool rather than a space for discussion. There will be discussions regardless no doubt, and you may still get your share of hostility, but that's the nature of it. You won't have to argue because nothing's decided yet, and you can pick up on the people who are approaching you openly with suggestions for improvements and involve them in the next stage of the process. And so on.
You'll need to be open to ultimately creating something that blends everyone's concerns. It'll take time. As you're very well aware, there are many of us who have different priorities to you, and you're going to have to finds ways to work in tandem with rather than in opposition to them. Given that we all have the same ultimate desire, getting this done is far from impossible. But it'll be a big job, so if you decide to take it on you'll need people around you who you can trust both to look out for you and to hold you to account. Not because you're the only one prone to confrontation on the topic, but because at that stage your actions will reflect on the project in ways others' will not.
And to the last point, Gaby's threat has no power behind it. I've spoken with El, there's no intention there to cut us off. Gaby's been through the same thing we all have, and she's not equipped to handle this kind of drama now. That's all. You don't have to censor yourself for fear of repercussions on that end, but I do think it's as good a moment as any to change your approach and make an actual difference.
I'm happy to help where appropriate. But it's going to need somebody driving it to get it off the ground, and people who have the ability to invest actively in it to keep it growing, and it's up to you to decide whether you're ready to take that on.